Why? Because people keep inboxing me on Facebook and asking me which new-gen console is the best for them.
Stop asking me that bloody question.
My own opinion is that there isn't one, because both the Xbox One and PS4 have weak libraries, release titles that have been panned, an online paywall for the Xbox One's main features and you still have ads, a less invasive online paywall for the PS4 and no backwards compatibility.
I don't support them. I won't, and I physically can't. I feel it supports the systemic eraser of console history in the pursuit of mild graphical enhancements. That's pretty bad.
Now onto my main point, disregard everything I say about consoles. Everything. Even the stuff I've just said.
Who the hell am I to tell you what to do with your money? Some random dude on the internet! I'm not here to tell you, I'm here to inform. There's a gossamer thin line, people.
The fact that there are people who are genuinely so confused about which console is better that they feel compelled to ask me how they should spend hundreds of pounds/dollars/rupees/whatever is worrying.
If you're basing that decision on what I think, me, Charlie Chitty, then you're not making decisions right.
I do not matter. At all. One bit. Nada. Zip.
However, if you have a quick Google or YouTube, you can find out much more about the Xbox One and PS4 and can then make an informed and knowledgeable decision rather than just getting one and feeling the compulsion to defend it simply because it was your choice. (Trust me, buyers remorse is not something that happens when you drop hundreds on an item. You'd instead start nitpicking nice bits about it.)
I mean, the other day I was in GAME and was talking to my friend who's getting an Xbox One to go alongside his PS4. Hey, I'm always trying hard in my pursuit of not being a dickhead, but I may have chirped about how the PS4 had some healthy indie games like Outlast that can keep you going between Triple A releases and how the Xbox One doesn't exactly match up to that.
But you need to understand that as much as I joke about being some cartoony hero, hellbent on saving helpless victims from the evil consoles.... I know, in my heart of hearts, that it's not my pejorative.
Don't listen to me. Do whatever the damn hell you want.
Just understand that I'm not jealous or bitter. If I had the money spare, I still wouldn't get an Xbox One or a PS4. It's not a financial thing.
At the end of it all, I want you to have as much fun as you possibly can on this often-times cold rock that flies through space. If you want to get an Xbox One, that's fine. If you want to get a PS4, that's fine.
I hope it's nice, and it makes you happy. Because thinking of people being made happy by video games makes me happy.
I hope you get it home and it turns on by itself, installed with thousands of your favourite games, and runs without electricity and serves iced coffee from 3pm onwards.
It's just not what I've been reading lately.
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