Tuesday 9 December 2014

Video Game Review: Little Big Planet 3.

So without any fanfare at all, Little Big Planet 3 dropped out of nowhere. No ads, no forum debates, no real newsworthy sites discussing it.

Little Big Planet is a platforming game that allows you to create your own platforming games and has been insanely popular with over eight million levels made by the community. It has a Story Mode and a Create Mode. You collect materials, decorations and stickers in the story mode to use in the create mode.




Its first and second iterations were made by Media Molecule, but the third has been made by Sumo Digital, an independent UK company based in Sheffield.

I'm going to go ahead and spoil this for you right off of the bat, despite the fact that I'm usually expected to play it out and make jokes and be humorous.

The game is buggy and unplayable. I wish I was exaggerating when I say unplayable. The game is literally stuck in the same space.

There were initial problems that were minor such as not being able to place down stickers or things in Create Mode that would have been annoying but otherwise fine. After the December 4th patch, the game items at the end of each level haven't loaded at all and are impossible to pick up. On some sections, my character won't move. There are lag problems, there are problems with the voice acting cutting out suddenly, basic AI won't work, features from the second game won't work, one particular section is presenting me with an end-of-level scoreboard that freezes the game entirely.... I could go on. The point is that I paid £49.99 for this game and it's just really, really bad.



Which is why nobody's discussing it probably.
People who don't like it aren't even being decried as haters, it's just that nobody bothered to pick the game up and the few that did were severely disappointed.
I don't think I missed any reviews. They only started coming in after I bought the game and took it home.

I could give you a blow-by-blow account of the limited story experience I had with the game along with the new banal characters or the out-of-place voice acting or the lack of charm in general, but instead, I'd like to make a point of just asking why this game was released in that state.

Why is it ever ok to release a buggy or unfinished game? If you did that a while back, hell even in the early 00's, you'd have your game canned and you'd be laughed out of your studios for not keeping up with video game progression.

Now people keep defending shoddy publishers saying "It'll be better when it's patched." "It'll be better when they improve it."

Well guess what, fuckfaces, I would be better if I improved into someone who went to the gym five times a week, owned twelve mansions and fifty-nine cars. But are we all going to delude ourselves into thinking that I am that because I, like every other dumb person on this scuzz-rock we call Earth, have the potential to do that?
No. BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE PSYCHOTIC. I CANNOT STRESS THAT ENOUGH.

Seriously! Devs and publishers who are bankrolled have so much money these days they put a video games critical or public failure down to a lack of marketing budget.

Don't believe me? Why the fuck is Paul McCartney singing in Destiny then?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=163_C5UVU-I

I hope you're listening to that as you read these words, and imagining those men in suits who just think that if they throw money at a problem and tell people that they're not owed anything then they'll just shut up and buy more, and consume more and be quiet.
And it's sort of working. People have Xbox Ones and PS4's despite the fact we've had over a whole year of new consoles and nothing to show for it.

You are owed something. A better game. A polished and finished game you paid for.

Titanfall is a multiplayer demo missing a campaign. Not a "A next-generation competitive multiplayer title that blurs the lines between traditional online shooters and single-player campaign." - Game Informer
Watch Dogs is a GTA-like with poor vehicle handling and a weak story. Not the "Best and most innovative game ever made." - Reddit forums.
Destiny is a failed MMORPG that needs you constantly online or otherwise will not work and feels half-done. Not The next evolution of the first-person action genre that provides an unprecedented combination of storytelling, cooperative, competitive, and public gameplay, and personal activities that are all seamlessly woven into an expansive, persistent online world.  - Destiny official site.


I just don't see why we're allowed to be lied to as much as we are about the specs of the game, the downgrading of graphics and content and all other matters.

If it was a tin of soup, a DVD, a comic, a book, a magazine or any other product, item or intellectual comestible, it would be illegal.

But it's only video games so who cares, right?

(Footnote, I will be continuing a review of this game when I can actually complete the level and will do reviews of both the new Create Mode and new Story Mode. However, neither work functionally yet.)



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